Sell, Refi, or Defer? Your Washington Playbook for the Marital Home (CDRE Guide)

Opening question:
As a Washington family law attorney, should your client sell, refinance, or defer the marital home?

Snippet answer:
Built for family law attorneys, this WA framework stress-tests sell, refi/equity buyout, or deferral so your orders actually fund, record, and close.

Start with the Washington lens

Washington isn’t a mechanical 50/50 state. You’re aiming for a result that’s just and equitable, and that means the real-world logistics matter: loan qual, equity, timelines, tax/transfer mechanics, and risk. My short rule: If it can’t close, it isn’t equitable in practice.

Option 1: Sell now

When it fits: Payments aren’t sustainable, equity is needed to settle, or risk is creeping in (deferred maintenance, HOA special assessments, solar/lease encumbrances, messy permits).

What to put in the order:

• • Possession, access, and personal property spelled out (no move-out standoffs).

• • Preliminary title required early—surface liens/HELOCs/UCCs before you promise numbers.

• • REET affidavit at recording with the correct divorce exemption (yes, even when exempt you still handle the paperwork).

Pro move: Decide who signs what at closing and how you’ll handle last-minute credits, repairs, or rent-backs—write it in.

Option 2: Refi + equity buyout

When it fits: One party wants the home and can qualify.

Financing realities (what underwriters look for):

• • Divorce equity buyouts are often priced like rate/term (not cash-out) when structured correctly—no cash back, proper documentation, and ownership/seasoning met.

• • Some products treat buyouts as special-purpose cash-out with different overlays. Translation: confirm the delivery path (Fannie vs. Freddie) before you promise a rate or timeline.

What to draft:

• • The buyout amount, a refi/assumption deadline, and a sale fallback if the deadline is missed.

• • Who pays closing costs and the lien release mechanics for the departing spouse.

• • Required milestone proofs (application date, conditional approval, clear-to-close).

Heads-up: Support paid/received can help or hurt qualifying. Anchor your timeline to how that income/debt will be counted.

Option 3: Defer with guardrails

When it fits: Neither party can qualify today, or timing the market makes sense. Deferral without structure is a slow-burn disaster; with structure, it buys time without bleeding equity.

What to draft so it doesn’t backfire:

• • Occupancy terms; who pays PITI/HOA/insurance/taxes; and maintenance standards.

• • Access/inspection rights and a modest repair reserve for capital items.

• • Automatic triggers to sell (payment default, missed refi deadline, relocation, or a date certain).

• • Who signs the eventual conveyance and how you’ll handle REET paperwork on that later transfer.

Washington-specific speed bumps (check these every time)

• • REET & divorce transfers: Use the correct exemption on the affidavit; don’t assume “exempt” means “ignore the form.”

• • Due-on-sale safe harbor: Transfers incident to divorce typically won’t trigger acceleration—but you still need to plan for assumption or refi to clear liability.

• • Homestead context: Washington’s homestead backdrop can shape creditor exposure during deferrals—add it to your risk scan.

Quick checklist for your file

• • Prelim title, mortgage statements, payoff and HELOC ledgers, HOA estoppel/payoff, permits, solar/lease docs.

• • Decide sell vs. refi vs. defer based on loan feasibility, equity math, and timeline risk—not hope.

• • Write the decree like a closing checklist: who signs, who pays, what happens if X misses Y.

Final takeaway

You’re not just dividing a house—you’re engineering a result that closes. Pick the path, draft like it must fund and record, and partner with a local Certified Divorce Real Estate Expert to keep your case moving with fewer surprises.

Join my October 2025 Family Law Divorce Class on October 30, 2025, 12:00–1:00 PM (online via Zoom).

Link below to register!